The announcement follows decades of aggressive marketing language inflation that experts say has rendered all location descriptions completely meaningless.
“Whether you’re adjacent to a major interstate, three hours from a commercial airport, or accessible only by emotional resilience, your community is strategically located,” said one site selection consultant while reviewing 47 nearly identical community websites. “At this point, the phrase mostly means ‘we have roads.’”
Communities have reportedly expanded the definition to include proximity to virtually anything.
One Midwest town recently promoted itself as “within a one-day drive of 70% of the U.S. population,” while a rural mountain community highlighted its “unparalleled access to global markets,” despite requiring two state highways, a ferry, and “reasonably good weather” to reach the nearest industrial site.
Meanwhile, local economic development organizations continue producing maps featuring glowing circles, animated freight icons, and arrows pointing aggressively toward unspecified opportunity.
“Our location offers unmatched connectivity,” explained one marketing brochure, moments before revealing the nearest four-lane highway is currently “part of a long-term transportation vision.”
Industry experts say the trend accelerated after communities realized they could simply layer enough buzzwords together until no one asked follow-up questions.
